Pizza

As an autism mom, I'm thankful for pizza. Here's why:  This weekend hasn't been a good one for me.  First off, my daughter is in a funk.  I literally have to wrestle with her to get her to do anything that involves wearing clothing or doing anything besides flooding the bathroom.  She's tantruming sooooo much right now.  I don't know what to do with my cute little girl.  Secondly, yesterday I found my iPad in the toilet. I think that pretty much means goodbye. I'm hoping the rice trick works, but I don't have high hopes cause the screen was already cracked, and I could totally see water all throughout it.  Perhaps the worst part of my weekend was when I went to check on Garrett (who I thought was napping), and his bedroom window was open, and there was no sign of Garrett. He figured out (and he's not even a rebellious teenager) that he could sneak out the window if he wanted to go have some fun.  Luckily, I knew he had been obsessing about our park across the street, so I didn't have to go far to find him.  So stressful. I ended up having to switch his and Caiti's bedrooms because Caiti's window leads to the backyard, so he's not going to run off if he climbs out of the window in that bedroom. That led to even more problems though.  Autism doesn't make it easy to handle change. Caiti has been screaming/kicking her bedroom door for 2 hours straight because she doesn't want to sleep in a new room.
So where does pizza come into all this:  My sister Michelle showed up this evening with a couple pizzas and a smile. That was the best part of my day. She knew just what I needed. I'm glad she followed whatever little prompting she was having and came to help brighten my day a little bit.

Autism Research

As an autism mom, I'm grateful for the numerous organizations dedicated to autism research.  Due to our family's strong family history of autism, Caiti who was 2 when we moved here, and Jason who was 6 months, took part in UCSD's study for Infant Development and Autism. It makes me proud that somehow we could use the situation we were handed in an effort to help the research community to find out a little more about autism.  My children were not a part of the study listed below, but I was very excited to see this article about recent findings also from UCSD:

UCSD finds genes possibly linked to autism

-Written by Gary Robbins

UC San Diego neuroscientist Eric Courchesne 

March 22, 2012 | Photo by Howard Lipin

UC San Diego has inched closer to the root causes of autism, identifying genes that appear to go haywire before a child is born, preventing the brain from developing normally.

Neuroscientist Eric Courchesne says he and his collaborators found evidence that many genes basically misfire, producing an overabundance of brain cells in the pre-frontal cortex that affect a child’s social, language and communications skills.

The problem begins during the second and third trimester of pregnancy, the period in which most brain cells are created.

“Essentially, the wiring pattern for the brain goes wrong and you don’t get normal development,” said Courchesne, director of the Autism Center of Excellence at the UCSD School of Medicine.

The findings, published Thursday in PLoS Genetics, could provide insight about how to treat and prevent autism.

Scientists say that part of the brain of young people with autism is significantly larger than those whose brains develop normally. UCSD Autism Center of Excellence

The new paper builds on a line of research that Courchesne has been following for years. In 2003, he showed that there is a link between the overgrowth of the brain and autism. Then last November, Courchesne reported that the brain of male boys with autism had 67 percent more cortical cells than they should have. Such cells are created before birth and play a fundamental role in social, communication and cognitive development.

The latest study indentifies at least some of the genes that are responsible for the problem, and helps to explain how and when the dysfunction occurs.

“This is telling us a lot about the beginnings of autism,” said Courchesne, who arrived at his conclusions by examining brain tissue samples from younger and older people who are autistic. He said, “We were looking for the residual signature of genes whose activity was not normal.”

Courchesne looked for these genetic “echoes” in people aged 2-14 years old, and in people 17-57.

“We looked at older people because it is well known that autism changes with age,” Courchesne said.

The researchers found evidence that, at least in some cases, the brain was attempting to rewire and remodel itself.

“That doesn’t necessarily mean that the rewiring is being done adequately or accurately. It could be getting things further and further wrong,” said Courchesne. “But many autistic children get better. It could be that some of the remodeling is successful. I am very excited about this.”

He said the findings from the adults “are telling us that the brain development problem hasn’t stopped. It is on-going. There may be signals or genetic changes that are attempting to deal with the original problem.

“That would seem to offer a potential target for pharmaceuticals to improve the remodeling.”

Daddy Will Be Home In This Many Days

As an autism mom of some cute kids who absolutely adore their daddy, I'm grateful for ways to help them know he's still around and will be back soon.  When Kevin is underway for a couple weeks or on deployment, it is so hard for these kids, but little things like this make it a lot easier.

Borrowed Inspiration

As an autism mom, I'm grateful for borrowed inspiration.  I have been kind of a boring mom lately. My kids are going crazy...and hence doing annoying things like flooding the bathroom and dumping bags of carrots, etc.  Today, I made myself admit that they get into the most trouble when I'm not paying attention to them.  So I decided to make myself play with them...but I totally drew a blank. I know that can be a problem with any mom, but especially of mothers of children with a way of thinking and seeing things that is different than theirs.  I looked into a bunch of blogs with lists of things to do with your kids.  Here are just a few:
http://makedoandfriend.blogspot.com/2012/03/40-ways-to-do-sensory-play.html
http://counting-on-me.blogspot.com/2011/05/101-things-to-do-with-your-toddler.html?m=1
http://littlefamilyfun.blogspot.com/
http://www.sixsistersstuff.com/2012/01/101-fun-easy-and-cheap-indoor-activites.html
http://www.redtedart.com/2011/09/01/boy-get-crafty/
http://cuegly.blogspot.com/2011/09/75-kid-activities.html
http://www.tipjunkie.com/crafts-boredom-busters/
http://www.digitalreflections.typepad.com/digital_reflections/2009/06/100-free-things-to-do-with-your-kids-this-summer.html

Then I wrote a bunch of appropriate activities for my kids down on popsicle sticks and made myself a "jar" out of decorated tupperware to keep them in.  Then when my kids are being especially antsy and bored... I can follow the advice on the front of the "jar" and get up off my butt and play with my kids.  :)

Unconventionality

As an autism mom, I'm thankful for the flexibility I have learned to have in accepting that things are rarely going to be normal at my house.  We are very good at being unconventional.
Here's an example; this morning I caught Jason writing on one of our kitchen chairs with a permanent marker.  I started to be annoyed...except that I thought it was soooo cute...among my feelings of,"How naughty!"
That, and the thought of how hard it is to actually remove the permanent marker, made me decide to just leave it.  So we labeled it with his name.  Then I had Caiti draw on a chair and wrote her name on it.  Same thing with Garrett.  So now we have unconventional chairs for my unconventional family.

St. Patrick's Day

As an autism mom, on St. Patrick's Day, I'm grateful for the green characters in my kids' lives.  The two favorites are Shrek, and Kermit.  :)

These are the go-to at my house when their mommy is ready to pull her hair out...or fall over from exhaustion.  Love these movies because actually, coincidentally, both Kermit and Shrek are entertaining to me, as an adult, as well my kids.  :)

Oh, and let's not forget who my kids think of when I make them try to say, "Happy St. Patrick's Day!"

Bubbles

As an autism mom, I'm so thankful for bubbles.  How fun are they?  My sister brought over her bubble machine, and my kids were happy and out of trouble for hours.  Yay!

Different Perspective

As an autism mom, I'm grateful for my kids, and how they help me see the world through different glasses.  :)

Photos

As an autism mom, I'm grateful that our pictures are, for the most part, highly entertaining.  I love the unposed way that my kids take their pics.  :)

The BEST family picture ever.

Garrett "helping" put up the Christmas tree.  :)

Cute Jason reading the daddy book when Daddy was deployed.

...and yesterday was our first attempt at a photo booth.  :)

Kim Stagliano's post: "The Crappy Life of an Autism Mom"

Kim Stagliano is another autism mother who has three children with autism.  I read her book, "All That I Can Handle: I'm No Mother Theresa," and reveled in it because she was so honest about everything.  She didn't make apologies for telling the truth about the struggles raising children with autism, but you could also sense her deep and intense love for her kids.  Anyway, since my last post was about potty issues, I felt like sharing her article, "The Crappy Life of the Autism Mom," published in the Huffington Post, because it's just so appropriate.  So many of us dealing with autism and potty training can relate.

Kim Stagliano

Author, 'All I Can Handle: I'm No Mother Teresa'

The Crappy Life of the Autism Mom

Posted: 01/03/07 05:05 PM ET

Well, that title should set off alarm bells in the Neurodiverse (ND) autism world.

Autism is like a box of Bertie Bott's Every Flavor Beans (from the Harry Potter books.) Some autistics got the raspberry cream or root beer flavor. They can speak eloquently, write blogs, move out on their own, marry, have children and manage their autistic traits. Others with autism, like my three girls, got the ear wax/vomit/dog poop flavor. They need help 24/7 to navigate the world. When I talk about autism, I mean the version that my three girls got. I'm not talking about the sort of autism that encompasses quirky kids with some social deficits who are otherwise brilliant.

The ND community tells me and tens of thousands of other parents that we are disrespecting our kids by trying to help them. The ND blogs berate us as wanting to change our kids because we don't accept them. Here's a "taste" of what autism looks like in the Stagliano household. Would you want something better for your kids?

Twice last month, we had a "crapisode." What is a crapisode? (This is where you might want to stop eating and put down your beverage.) My 10 year old (#2, appropriately for the purposes of this entry) pooped in the toilet. That is reason to cheer, believe me. Toilet training is a major issue in my section of the autism community. Our kids can wear diapers into their teens and beyond. So Miss G pooped. Hooray! But Miss G forgets to flush. And she rarely closes the lid. Not hooray.

Miss Peanut, my 6 year old, seems to believe that being a Virgo means she simply MUST swim in any puddle larger than spit. The toilet is like an Olympic sized pool to her. So Peanut goes into the toilet after Miss G has had her, ah, success. Peanut flings kaka everywhere and gets it all over herself, the floor, the walls, the tub, the baseboards and the window. Wes Craven could not film anything scarier than what I saw that school morning, 35 minutes before the bus was due to arrive. That's a "crapisode." It happens in the blink of an eye while I'm washing dishes or doing laundry. I'm alerted by a splashing sound that drops a brick into my stomach. Miss G doesn't understand to flush and close the lid. Miss Peanut doesn't realize that a face full of feces is rarely considered a way to amuse oneself outside of the fetish community.

I will never stop trying to help my girls recover from their autism. I can not tell you what recovery means. It varies by kid and according to God's grace. If recovery means only that Peanut understands she should sit on the toilet, not play in the toilet, I'll take it.

Recovering your kids doesn't mean denying their value as people. To the contrary, it means we are willing to devote our lives, our savings, our sanity to their improved health, development and well being.

Maybe we need an expanded vocabulary. The ND's can keep the word autism and my kids get a new label. Fine by me. Just don't tell me to give up on my girls and accept their version of autism (remember the Bertie Bott's beans) as simply a different type of personality. Because THAT'S a load of crap.

Potty

So, after spending 30 minutes hosing (or showering...whichever way you want to look at it) off my daughter and cleaning up a bunch of crap (literally) underneath our swing set, I'm just going to have to say that I'm grateful for the times that my kids are successful in the potty area.  That way I won't scream, or throw myself a pity party...or vomit cause some aspects of life are just pretty disgusting here at my house.
I am grateful for the many resources out there for potty training.  An example of one resource I really like is the social story that I got the above picture from.  I know it's a faux pas to put pics of kids pooping or peeing on the internet, so it's hard to explain to a kid who is visual and not good with language where their poop goes.  I found that social story at http://sam26847.tripod.com/id23.html, and it's my favorite one out there.

I was all proud of myself when I thought up a game for Caiti where I had three pictures:  One of the potty, one underneath the swings, and one in her bedroom.  It was called "Where Do I Go Potty?" I attached little velcro pieces to the different places and then cut out a pic of poop and put velcro on the back.  The funny thing is...on paper, she totally knows poop goes in the potty.  She got it right every time she tried. It is just getting her to do it in real life that is the hard part.
I just got a pretty good ap on the iPad, it's also on the android, called See Me Go Potty.  Here's a link for the information.  http://www.avakid.com/products.html

It's a great potty training ap.   Anyway, I like that it has an Avatar that you can make look like your kid, and that it shows an animated version of an accident or of going to the potty along with a nice little script that I expect Garrett will memorize and repeat spontaneously.  It would make me really happy if he memorized the words and then actually did what he was saying..."I walk, walk, walk to the potty." Then I wouldn't have to have the responsibility of taking my kids potty on a schedule.
So, to repeat my first sentence...I'm grateful for the times they go in the toilet, and not in their pants or on the ground.  I like the days when I don't feel like I live in a giant toilet.  Here's to hoping things will progress.  As always...patience is the key...right?

First-Then

As an autism mom, and I'm sure so many autism parents can relate, I'm thankful for "First, Then" statements.  It is pretty cool that I can use these statements to help my kids understand that eventually they will get what they want or that they don't have to be stuck doing something they don't want to do.  I've used it as a motivator to get them to do their chores, to go potty. Every morning I get Garrett gets motivated for school by stating, "First school, then daddy."

Speaking of daddy, I had the CUTEST, SWEETEST little experience yesterday with Jason where I used a "first-then" statement.  Yesterday was President's Day, so all the kids and Kevin were home.  We had a pretty good day.  Jason was Kevin's shadow all day, and I think Kevin loved it.  He totally wore Kevin out though, asking for rides, etc., all day.  So, in order to give Kevin a break I had Jason come take a nap with me.  He was so upset, crying for several minutes, and I didn't know how to calm him down and get him to go to sleep.  Then I heard him say, "Dee dee."  I knew he wanted to be with his daddy, so I said, "First Nigh Night, then daddy."  He sort of stopped mid cry, and looked at me with his big, teary eyes, and repeated, "Dee dee?"  So I just kept telling him "First Nigh Night, then daddy," and he calmed right down and was asleep in a matter of seconds.  It was so sweet to get him to understand that he could still see his buddy if he took his nap first.  :)

Mod Podge

As an autism mom, I'm thankful for Mod-Podge (a.k.a. decoupage), and here is why:  As a part of Caiti's therapy, she is supposed to get herself dressed in the morning before school.  She has a picture schedule to follow, and at times, we have velcroed pics of different items of clothing on the drawers to help her know what is in them.  This doesn't work too well at my house though because Jason thinks it is way too fun to take the pics off of the velcro and put them somewhere else.  I figured out that I could redo my daughter's dresser in a more functional way that didn't involve little pictures and velcro, just using some fun paper and some Mod Podge.

Mod Podge Dresser Tutorial:

Supplies you will need:

Of course you will need a dresser.  You will also need Mod Podge (or you can make homemade Mod Podge by mixing equal parts Elmer's glue and water), Mod Podge Sealant spray (if you so desire), Scrapbooking Paper, Alpha Punchouts (if you are lazy or have bad handwriting like me...they come in the scrapbooking section and have various fonts of letters you can just punch out and glue on to your projects), scissors, a pen or pencil, a screw driver and whatever embellishments you choose to use.

Step 1:

Remove drawer from dresser.  Using a screwdriver, unscrew the drawer handle and place the handle and screws aside for later.

Step 2:

Measure out the part of the drawer you want to cover.  I used two scrapbook papers per drawer.  Cut the paper to size, spread Mod Podge on the drawer front and carefully place the paper on top of the Mod Podge, making sure to smooth out any bubbling (one website suggested using a credit card edge to smooth out the bubbling).  Once the paper is in place, take the handle screws and carefully poke them through their holes from the inside.  This should leave a small imprint where the holes should be. Then take the screws and forced them through the paper on the outside where the imprints were left to make the holes for the handle.
Step 3:

I decided to add some embellishments to my drawer handles.  I bought felt buttons in different colors and shapes.  They already had holes in the middle, but if they hadn't, I would have just folded them in half, and cut two slits (like an X) and placed them on the drawer handle (as shown above).  I then reattached the handle to the drawer, using the screw driver.

Step 4:

Using a pen, draw a picture of what you want to go into the drawer you are working on.  Cut the picture out, and either cut out letters or use punch-out letters to spell out what will be in the drawer.

Step 5:

Add another layer of Mod Podge, so that the drawer surface will be sticky.  Then place the cutout letters and drawing where you want them to go on the drawer.  Afterward, apply a couple more coatings of the Mod Podge, being especially generous over the letters and the picture.  Don't worry about the white color of the Mod Podge.  It won't look like that when you are done.

Step 6:

Allow the drawers to dry.   You will know they are dry when the Mod Podge is clear.  Once they are dry, follow the directions on the sealant can.  Spray the drawers and allow them to dry before returning them to the dresser.

Finished Product:

here are my sons' dressers.  Can't decide which I like best, but I'm happy with the results.  :)

Ikea

As an autism mom, I'm thankful for Ikea.  I'm not just thankful for all their awesome but affordable products...the main reason I'm thankful is that my favorite home movie was captured at Ikea.  My sister and my friend (who is also the kids' tutor) took my daughter to Ikea on an outing.   They do outings sometimes to help them learn to act appropriately in their natural environment.  Needless to say, Ikea was a little much for my daughter with her sensory issues.  Here is what finally calmed her down.  :)

Weighted Blanket

As an autism mom, I'm SO thankful for my sister, Nicole, who has my family for Christmas this year.  Earlier she had asked me what I would want for my kids.  I told her, "If you were really rich, I would say weighted blankets!"  She then made it happen for me.  She found online tutorials for weighted blankets, and spent hours and hours thinking through how to make the best blankets for my kids and sewing each individual quilting pillow and weighing them to make sure the weight would be distributed evenly.   She was so thoughtful about the little details.  For example, my youngest, Jason is very into biting and chewing everything.  So, to prevent him from ruining his blanket, she added ribbons on the ends for him to chew on, like some baby blankets have.  We just got Jason's in the mail (such a wonderful early Christmas present!), and we are so excited to get the rest of them.  I am so grateful for the time, money and thought that she put into these.  I know this will help so much with their sleeping issues...which will then help with my sleeping issues...which will then help me be a nicer, cheerier mommy.  :)

Pinterest

As an autism mom, I'm blessed/cursed to have discovered pinterest.  But I'm grateful for it.  It helps me find lots of good ideas for my kids, their diet, activities...etc.  (My board for GF/CF foods is http://pinterest.com/roach_family/gluten-free-casein-free/
and my board for autism is http://pinterest.com/roach_family/autism/). 
The main reason I actually like it is that it has helped my creative juices to start flowing (although I kind of hate that expression...it makes me think of someone drooling or something).  I've gotten out of my own uncreative rut and decided to try out some of the crafts and ideas on there, and that is something that makes my day a little brighter.  :)  Here are the things that I have actually gotten done on my pinterest boards: http://pinterest.com/roach_family/stuff-i-actually-did-from-pinterest/  Who knew I could be semi-crafty/homemakerly (if that is even a word).



Swimming Pools

As an autism mom, I'm grateful for swimming pools.  My kids are so obsessed with the water.  I find Caiti constantly turning on the sink in the bathroom or the kitchen or trying to climb into the washing machine.  I have found Jason sitting with his feet inside the toilet all too many times...sigh.  So, yes, I'm grateful for a body of water that isn't gross to get wet in and won't flood my floors.  :)  Of course, I have to include the life jackets in my gratitude list.  My kids had adapted swim lessons last year, but as with all things, that takes time for them to catch on.  Their life jackets help them feel independent and help me to know they are safe while in their heavenly pool.

Extended Family

As an autism mom, I am thankful for my amazing extended family who loves my kids unconditionally and are there for me when I need to laugh or cry.  :)  They are the best.  Such a blessing in my life and the lives of my kids!!!!

Larraine McCrea (a.k.a the gluten gal)

As an autism mom, I am thankful for my Aunt, Larraine McCrea (who makes me call her Ant instead of Aunt cause she's contrary).  She has been such a support to me my whole life.  As an autism mom, she has been the most important resource when it came to trying the gluten-free/caseine-free diet. 
Ant was diagnosed with celiac disease after being sick and misdiagnosed for many years.  As a way of coping with this diagnosis and helping others with celiac disease, she started her blog: http://www.theglutengal.com/.   She is very creative and an excellent cook and has so many awesome gluten free recipes on her website.  She has given me so many ideas for how to eat gluten free without having to go to go to some expensive health store, buy obscure products or learn fancy ways to cook things.  It was so refreshing to learn how to eat this way from someone that would make regular meals.  :)  Once I started the diet with my kids, Ant started adding caseine-free options to her gluten-free recipes, and now the majority of her website is both gluten and caseine free.  Sometimes I even contribute...like the GF/CF candy list in October.
This diet isn't for everyone with autism.  Some kids don't see a difference at all.  But for my kids, it helps them to sleep through the night, stim a lot less, give better eye contact and not be so much in their own heads.  Just the sleeping part, alone, makes this diet worth it for me.  Thanks Ant for helping me figure it all out.

Other Blogs By Autism Moms

As an autism mom, I'm greatful for those other blogs out there by autism moms.  This blog post is probably my favorite of all.  Love it!!!  It is from http://www.starkravingmadmommy.com/2011/04/top-ten-things-you-should-and-shouldnt.html and I just had to copy and paste it on my blog because it's great.

Top Ten Things You Should (and Shouldn't) Say to The Parent of an Autistic Child

If you're the parent or caregiver of a child on the autism spectrum, Autism Awareness Month is not for you.  You are already aware of autism.  Like, really, really aware.  Aware that you need another cup of coffee, a Xanax, and possibly an advanced degree in Education Law.

Autism Awareness Month is for everyone else.  To help out, here's my Top Ten Things You Should (and Shouldn't) Say to The Parent of an Autistic Child.

10. DON'T SAY: "Wow, your son is great at math.  He's just like Rain Man."

      DO SAY:  "Wow, your son is great at math."


9. DON'T SAY: "He should probably be in a special class, so other kids won't make fun of him."

   DO SAY:  "We should probably be teaching our children more empathy."


8. DON'T SAY:  "You should try giving your kid more discipline."

    DO SAY: "You should try these brownies I made for you."


7. DON'T SAY: "Wow, your kids all seem to have a lot of problems.  Have you ever heard of Munchausen by Proxy Syndrome?"

    DO SAY: "Wow, you're really on top of things for your kids.  It must be hard, but it seems like you're doing a great job."


6. DON'T SAY:  "You should change your child to an astronomically expensive, all-organic, gluten-free, casein-free diet of locally-grown organic broccoli and imported, cruelty-free snake oil capsules."

    DO SAY:  "Please sit down and rest while I make you some bacon-topped meatloaf and pour you a glass of wine."


5.  DON'T SAY: "I think autism is over-diagnosed these days. They're handing that label out like Mardi Gras beads."

    DO SAY: "I am alarmed by studies that show that autism spectrum disorders are actually under-diagnosed in girls and minorities.  Excuse me while I e-mail my legislator about my desire that he or she increase the fundng for autism research and education."


4. DON'T SAY: "Isn't he getting a little big for diapers?"

    DO SAY: "Here, I picked up this case of diapers and some extra Febreze for you while I was at the store."


3.  DON'T SAY: "I wish my kid was getting free extra help in school like that."

     DO SAY: "I wish I had remembered to mention to my legislator my desire that he or she stop slashing the budget for special education services like they're freaking Zorro or something.  Excuse me while I go send another email."


2.  DON'T SAY: "You look exhausted."

    DO SAY: "How about if I play Lego Star Wars with your kids for the next four hours while you take a nap?"


1.  DON'T SAY: "He's fine / it's no big deal / he'll grow out of it / all kids are like that."

     DO SAY: "It's so great that you got the diagnosis, even though he's obviously awesomesauce exactly the way he is."

Queen Califia's Magical Circle

As an autism mom, I'm grateful for Queen Califia's Magical Circle.  It is a beautiful mosaic garden done by French artist, Niki De Saint Phalle.  It's located in Escondido, CA, in Kit Carson State Park.  The first time I took my children there, I dubbed it "Autism Heaven" because there were so many beautiful colors, textures, mirrors.  It was amazing.  When I need to find something to do with my kids, that is a free place to go where I know they will all be happy. 

Little Reminders

As an autism mom, I'm grateful for the little reminders to be happy that I have posted in my house.  :)  This particular saying is something I found in a Seagull Book in SLC, UT when I was there visiting my sister, and I found it absolutely perfect for my home.  It reminds me that I am blessed each and every day when I look at it.

Mirrors

As an autism mom, I am grateful for the hours of entertainment mirrors provide my kids...and me when I am watching them. :)

Mattress protectors

As an autism mom, and basically any mom, I'm grateful there are mattress protectors for my cute little bed wetters so my whole house doesn't smell like urine.  The best mattress protectors I have found are at Ikea.  They are really soft on the top and have that vinyl-type bottom to keep the wetness off the mattress.  The sides that go over the bed are made of a stretchy fabric, so they don't rip if your kids are...say...bed jumpers.
My sister, also known as the coolest person ever at our house, also got these great mattress covers like the ones you use at the hospital, for my kids since they are getting bigger and sometimes mattress protectors don't fully protect the mattress. 

www.amazon.com/Priva-Ultra-Waterproof-Sheet-Protector/dp/B000FOA7C2/ref=sr_1_2?s=hpc&ie=UTF8&qid=1326640937&sr=1-2

Grocery Delivery

As an autism mom, I'm grateful for grocery stores that do home grocery delivery.  When I don't have someone to watch my kids and have to go grocery shopping, the LAST thing I want to do is take them with me.  I discovered grocery delivery by accident.  One week I was short on food and payday was a few days away.  I asked my sister if she could wire me some  money to help me get groceries.  She looked online for me and found that Von's (a grocery chain in California) did home delivery for a $10 fee.  She was able to pay for the groceries from her home in the midwest, and then they delivered them to my home here in CA.  I was absolutely amazed that this option was available. 
I have used the home-delivery service with Vons (Safeway Foods) often since then.  It was a staple for us when my husband was deployed. 
This is a good website to find stores in your area that do home delivery:
http://singleparents.about.com/od/homelife/tp/grocery_deliver.htm

Healthy Coping Mechanisms

As an autism mom, I'm grateful for healthy coping mechanisms.  Sometimes you just have to grieve, to feel the sadness that your child/children didn't turn out to be who you expected.  You grieve for the child you thought they were going to be.  It's hard not to turn to unhealthy outlets for a release.  For me, the best way to cope is to write about it.  I have a mad journal where I can write anything I want and not feel bad about it.  I also write poems.  This poem was written at a time when I felt that my daughter had no connection with me.  I struggled so much with that sadness at the time...Luckily, my therapist told me to get into her world, to notice the things she loves and make myself a part of them.  Slowly but surely she realized that I wasn't just another fixture in the room, but someone fun that she could love.  :)

Help Me Know How To Reach You

My little baby. Beautiful Baby Caiti.

You brought me healing and sweetness and calm.

You were for my heart a miracle balm.

I remember how you would snuggle me close, let me hold you.

With a smile in your eyes, so beautiful and blue.

Your head on my chest and your curls framing your face.

You would always send me to a happy place.

Caiti it's been sad for me as you have grown older.

Yes, you still put your head on my shoulder.

Yes you still have that smile in your eyes

But it's different now, because you also cry.

You get so upset, I don't know what to do.

Caiti I wish I knew how to help you.

I want to be the mommy you need me to be.

I wish you had the language to communicate to me.

I wish I could get into your head,

and I could hear your thoughts as you place toys on your bed.

I could understand why they're all lined in a row

The thoughts in your head would be so great to know.

I think you know I love you, I adore my little girl.

I cherish your giggle as you run and you twirl.

Caiti, as your mommy, I want to know how

To love you the way that you need me to now.

I need to know just the way that I can reach you.

I need to know just the way that I can teach you.

Because Caiti I love you, I love you! I do!